Sunday, May 08, 2011

The Difference Ten Minutes Makes

Oh man, Ted has started his night waking again, so if I look a little zombie-like, or if you have to tell me the same thing three times before I respond, please be sympathetic to the sleep deprived. I'm not sure exactly what drives it, except that it looks as though this latest batch has a lot to do with a steep learning curve. Last night he stirred and fed constantly from about 12-2am, then asked to get up. Actually he doesn't ask, he's remarkably canny - instead he always says he wants food or needs to do a wee (both are things I will always get up for). Anyway, last night he ran out into the playroom; I turned on the light, he grabbed a marker and immediately started 'writing', which in Tedland means drawing little up and down squiggles in the one spot, sitting back and announcing which letter it is, then leaning back over to do the same thing and pronounce it a different letter. Cute...really cute for sure...but NOT AT TWO FREAKING AM OK?

We've had adventures a-plenty lately, but what has been really of note in the house this past week is the change in Harriet's general demeanour. We've been working on making sure Harriet has a dedicated ten minutes a night (timed by the oven timer) of pure one-on-one Mama time. She had been lamenting her lack of this special attention for quite some time now and when we decided to make it a priority it quickly became obvious just how difficult that time was to arrange.

So now, for ten minutes each evening, Harriet has me all to herself. I play what she desires. I do no suggesting, just follow her lead. We laugh and be silly and renew our connection with each other all in ten minutes! Really, the difference has been amazing. We've still had meltdowns but many, many fewer than we had been having. And the aggression towards Ted has started to ease as well which is a relief.

Today, in the best Mothers Day gift I could ever have wanted, Harriet spent the day actually listening to what we were saying, calming herself down when she was starting to become hysterical/upset/angry, and we had an incredibly calm, happy and FUN day. At one point, while Teddy slept, all three of us were sitting out in the glorious sunshine, in silence, reading our novels together. Oh happy day! Truly, really, awesomely great.

Ted is loving this new Harriet a lot, too. He's much more spontaneously affectionate with her and now that she's listening to his reactions (eg: screaming GET OFF ME HARRIET RIGHT NOW doesn't make her kiss him more) he is happy to engage in cuddles and kisses with abandon, knowing he can remove himself from them at any time. Tonight I peeked in at them having a bath together and they were hugging each other, then proceeded to 'pat' each other as though they were cats. Too cute.

Last night Harriet decided to make a storybook for her friend Zoe P's birthday party this morning. She sat down and wrote out the book, illustrated it, decorated it with glitter glue and actually concentrated on it for over an hour. It was so awesome I wished I could have kept it for myself! But of course I took photos - will post them up tomorrow.

Short but sweet post this time. Just like our little people (well ok maybe not so short for Harriet).

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